This Better Not Get Me Fired

The only way to guarantee that you will not get hit by a car is to lock yourself in a building, such as a house, and remain only in rooms that are not adjacent to the street or driveway. Abstinence from cars is the only way to prevent getting hit by cars. Don’t even get close to them because the risk exists when you get in their company.

If, however, you choose to engage in risky behavior like crossing streets, then be sure you limit your risk by looking both ways before you cross the street. Don’t step out suddenly into the street, particularly from behind a parked car or truck. Cross the street quickly and don’t engage in crazy forms of street crossing, like interstate highways or six-lane busy streets. Cross at the crosswalks, especially on busy roads. I’d rather you not cross the street at all, but if you do, do it safely. Limit your risks.

And if you want to drive, well, I’ll still love you even if you make that choice. But, please, PLEASE, wear a seat belt. Observe general traffic conditions, drive safely, don’t speed. And for goodness’ sake, DO NOT TEXT AND DRIVE. Again, abstinence from driving is the only way to be 100% sure you’re not going to get killed by a car, but if you are going to drive, you need to drive safely. Limit your risks.

My advice can be analogous for other kinds of risky behavior.

2 thoughts on “This Better Not Get Me Fired

  1. deanwebb Post author

    Abstaining from texting is the only 100% way to keep from texting something regrettable to a former paramour at 3AM when you’re totally drunk and overemotional.

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