Top 10 Reasons Why Roaches Aren't Good Pets

10. Let 'em out of the cage and they get just about everywhere.

9. Ever try to fit a leash on one of these guys?

8. They constantly get underfoot.

7. Housetraining with a rolled-up newspaper usually kills them.

6. Although easy enough to feed, who wants to watch them eat?

5. Hard to find a veterinarian who specializes in domesticated, invertebrate vermin.

4. Guests tend to have adverse reactions to frisky roaches bounding onto their laps.

3. Burglars laughingly disregard "Beware of Roach" signs.

2. Always have to tell the Orkin man, "Skip that one, he's a keeper!"

...and the NUMBER ONE REASON:

Who wants to pet the back of a bug? EW!